A Change of Plans
by run4life
Summary: What if Sophie had completely rejected Howl on May Day? He's going to prove to her that no girl can resist him, then leave her with a broken heart, but soon he's going to find that that isn't quite so easy. Who will fall for whom? HowlxSophie. Movie-based
1. Ordinary Girl

Chapter 1: Ordinary Girl

A/N: This is my first fanfic, oddly I'm kind of nervous! Haha. Please comment, I want to know what you think of my work :)

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Howl's Moving Castle, sadly.

Sophie

I watched the other girls from the hat shop start off down the street, laughing and enjoying themselves. Not that I regretted not joining them. Because I had never quite fit in with the others. They all wore bright colors and laughed a lot and gushed over the latest fashion trends. They even obsessed over the Wizard Howl, the most terrible and cruel wizard in all Ingary, who could be found wandering the Wastes in his walking castle. Apparently he was very handsome, and tricked girls into loving him only to eat their hearts. (I didn't see why they nearly passed out whenever his castle came near town. He was probably terrifying and most likely would know that everyone thought so, which in turn would make him conceited on top of everything else.)

All that just wasn't my kind of thing. I was just the plain brown mouse in the corner that no one seemed to pay any attention to, even if I wanted them to. Which was rare. But still. I was eighteen years old and never had a boyfriend, for crying out loud! Not even so much as a friend who happened to be a boy.

It made me wonder what it was like to be wanted. To be missed even for a minute, to always be in the spotlight. Spotlights. Ugh. I shuddered at the thought, then gave a start. Black smoke from the passing train billowed outside the window, blocking out the sun for a few seconds.

I sighed and leafed through the piles of hats still on the table. Maybe I was done for the day after all. I stood up stiffly and dusted off my work apron before hanging it up and grabbing my hat. I went down the stairs, past the courtyard, and into the hat shop. Glancing around, I saw that the girls had put up the 'closed' sign on the door. I blinked, then smiled fondly realizing what happened. Those girls, they were so smart sometimes. So maybe I wasn't like them, but we all knew each other well enough anyhow. I walked to the tri-fold mirror and smoothed my plain-looking brown braid before I put my hat on, smiling like an idiot and trying to look halfway decent. _I fail_, I thought, exhaling and looking sullen.

Turning, I decided to catch the trolley before it left. I made sure the shop door was locked, then made my way through a small crowd to get to the already-packed trolleys heading into town for the May Day festivities. I jumped onto the nearest one, hanging on near the edge just before it began to move.

I was the first to get off and immediately hurried across the square, fully aware that I was the only one walking this way, away from the crowd watching a bunch of blue-uniformed soldiers and a lot of others important people get bigger egos as they marched down the street to applause and lots more of all that festive stuff. Don't get me wrong; I love celebrations. It's just that, what's the point, if no one cares if you're there or not? But it was May Day and everyone was out so I figured this was good enough for me. I got to one of the back streets and crossed a courtyard, using my perfected art of getting places without too many people seeing me. I took the slip of paper out of my pocket with directions to Cesari's bakery, where Lettie said she'd be working today.

The sound of cheering and music got louder and I found myself looking up an alley to the crowded center of town again. I high-tailed it in the opposite direction without a thought. _Surely that other street I need must connect…_ I thought, looking up and back behind me for a sign, or anything, as I came around a corner. I turned forward again to look where I was going and stopped short when I found myself staring at what looked suspiciously like the front of a military uniform—well, jeez. How could I have missed someone walking right at me? I was spacing out so much more than usual today. I stepped back to apologize and hurry along when I realized that the soldier that belonged to the uniform was leaning casually against the wall, looking down at me. He couldn't have been all that much older than me and everything about him was screaming 'ego overflow'.

"Hey. Looks like a little mouse lost its way," he said, smiling impishly.

I took half a step back. He _so_ was not trying to pull that line. However, I didn't exactly make a snappy comeback. "Oh. No. I'm not lost." And I wasn't! I was just…mistaken about my location and where to go next.

"This little mouse looks thirsty. We should take her for a cup of tea." He stood up and blocked my way as I tried to step around him. His friend came out of the wide doorway behind him. So that was why I hadn't heard them coming; they'd just been standing there. _Duh, Sophie. You little idiot, _I scolded myself.

"No thanks, my sister's expecting me," I tried to be polite and firm but probably ruined the effect by hiding under the brim of my hat.

His friend leaned down to get a good look at my face and I saw that he had a big brown moustache. "She's pretty cute for a mouse."

"How old are you, anyway? You live around here?" Bigheaded Number One asked flirtatiously.

I gritted my teeth. "Leave me alone!"

He just smirked at Number Two. "Ya see? Your moustache scares _all_ the girls," he complained.

"So? I think she's even cuter when she's scared," his friend retorted, still closely contemplating my face.

I was trying to come up with something that would make them leave off when someone seemingly appeared out of nowhere to stand next to me, putting their hand on my opposite shoulder possessively. I stiffened and probably looked terrified—another one to get rid of?—until I heard them speak.

"There you are sweetheart, sorry I'm late. I was looking everywhere for you," said a male voice. But it wasn't just a voice; it was down-to-earth but soft, deep but slightly lilting, a little lazy but you got the feeling it could crack like ice if the speaker wanted it to. It was gorgeous to listen to. I could have replayed those few words for hours in my head and never be tired of them, but right now I had stuff to deal with.

"Hey, hey. We're busy here," the first soldier said irritably.

"Are you really?" said the owner of the arm around me. "It looked to me like you two were just leaving." And with that he flipped his hand up with a long, thin index finger extended. The two soldiers immediately stood up straight, and swiveled around when he flicked his wrist, looking rather insulted and disturbed by what was happening to them and protesting loudly. As the man beside me held his hand out and motioned to the side, the two began a fast-paced march around us and down the alley. I was in shock myself. How did he do that? He must have magic, that was the only explanation. But wizards were evil and dangerous! No one in their right mind, or any mind at all, ever voluntarily went within miles of them if they could help it. Why would one go out of his way to save someone, let alone a little ordinary nobody like me?

"Don't hold it against them. They're actually not all that bad."

I looked up to see the man's face and practically fainted. And I had thought his voice was beautiful. He was tall and thin but still nicely muscled, with blond hair that looked like it captured the sun and held it there. His mouth was lazy and one side seemed to be turned up in a perpetual mischievous smile, but his straight nose made him more down-to-earth, somehow. What shocked me were his eyes. They were blue, but any color was just too plain to describe them. If his hair absorbed the sun, then his eyes had surely taken some combination of sea and sky. All in all, he made for an intimidating person, but I got the impression of something childlike behind those eyes. How odd.

I had about half a second to take this all in and most likely looked fairly stunned. With good reason. Now I _really_ couldn't figure out why he had helped me. But he was speaking again with that gorgeous voice.

"Where to? I'll be your escort this evening." He smiled calmly, like he dropped in on people like this every day. Well, maybe he did.

"Oh! I-well-I _was _going to the bakery…" I blurted without thinking. What was I doing? He could practically stalk me if I kept blabbing. He was just too much to take in at once.

But no matter how beautiful, he had to be a wizard and was going to kill me any second.

"Alright. Well then, let's get you there," the wizard said to me. I stopped as I was about to take a step.

"Ah, thank you for helping me. But I really should go." I got my wits about me again and began to edge away from him. At least his arm wasn't around me anymore.

"Well, in any case, you did seem to be lost—" he started to point out but I interrupted him.

"I'm not lost! I know exactly where I'm going and how I'm intending to get there." I turned to march down the alley in what I thought was the right direction. He was a pushy wizard, wasn't he.

"Left."

I turned. "I beg your pardon?"

A smile tugged at his lips again. "If you go left, you'll be close. But before you leave…" He was at my side faster than my eyes could track him with his arm around me again. "At least let me buy you a drink."

Tempting, but I choose life, thanks. "Sorry. Thanks, but no thanks. I have people waiting for me." I smiled up at him sweetly. He looked quite taken aback, like he didn't know what to say to a no. Probably used to being obeyed at a second's notice. Taking a longer look at him, I could see something else in him fairly plainly that I hadn't seen at first. Vanity. He was so preoccupied with himself that his ego had shot through the roof long ago. One more reason to get away. But before I left, I just had to needle him with something else. It was out-of-character for meek little Sophie, but I couldn't stand people who thought of themselves above everyone else.

"And, by the way—would you happen to be one of those famous wizards that _everyone_ is always talking about?" I asked him, resisting the urge to bat my eyelashes at him. Not like it would work, but it was still tempting.

He obviously thought he'd won me back. He pulled me a little closer to him, still smiling seductively. "That would normally depend on who's asking, but since it's you, I'll tell you that I'm the greatest wizard there is."

I giggled. "Well alright, fair enough." I put some coldness into my expression then. "I just hope all those _lesser_ wizards aren't following your example, because I mean really, _teaching _people to be overconfident asses? These days, that's taking it a bit far, don't you think?" I shrugged off his arm for good measure and waltzed away down the alley and to the left, glancing at him out of the corner of my eye as I turned the corner, my braid swinging. He was in obvious extreme shock and looked like he was about to explode. Good. I smiled, seeing the lights of Cesari's not far off across the main square.


	2. Stolen

Chapter 2: Stolen

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Howl's Moving Castle, sadly.

A/N: So here's the update, hope you like it :) plz R&R and all that good stuff!

Howl

That girl just rejected me. She refused me. She insulted me! The nerve of that…that…bitch! I felt the air whoosh out of my lungs all at once as I felt like I was deflating. Completely confused and ready to go on a rampage, I swept my arm out and vanished, reappearing on my castle's doorstep. I flung open the door and stomped inside, grumbling at Calcifer to make some hot water for my bath.

The fire demon gave me a knowing look as I stalked past him. "So who was it this time? Rachel? Elizabeth. I know! It was Cassandra wasn't it?"

I gave him a glare. "If you must know, it was a new girl."

"Now Howl, that doesn't make any sense at all. If it was a new one, how'd she dump y—ohhh. Oh I see. _I_ see." He resisted the urge to cackle, much to my non-amusement.

Markl, my apprentice, was sitting amongst piles of spells to learn and chose to pipe up. I hadn't even noticed him there. "Master Howl, what happened? Did a girl dump you?"

I opened my mouth, insulted enough as it was, but Cal beat me to it. "Nope," he guffawed. "She didn't even give him a chance! Howl got rejeeected…" he felt the need to keep chortling.

_This is humiliating_, I thought miserably. _Mocked by a flame no more than ten inches high_.

How could she refuse me! How? Someone with my looks? What girl on the face of this earth would dream of turning down a handsome wizard? So what about the stories I'd spread about eating girls' hearts? None of the others had ever cared. No. This one was different. She was in complete denial of me. I had to get her to accept me, or my confidence would take a serious beating and I'd break my running record. I'll make her see… And if she won't… Well, I'll just have to devise a new strategy.

An evil smile crept back over my face as I moved to the stairs again.

Calcifer stopped laughing. "…Howl?"

"Hot water, Cal, remember?" I snickered to myself as I ascended the stairs.

I trotted back down an hour later, congratulating myself on my genius.

"Gonna try getting her to come over to your side again, eh, Howl?" Calcifer grinned, picking up on my mood.

"Well, I'm pretty sure she's resistant to all the traditional methods. I figured out why. She has a strong spirit—stronger than most people, if I do say so myself," I replied. When Calcifer gave me a 'go on' look, I continued. "Yes, her spirit's hard to break. But not impossible, and I think she may find some things a little difficult to run away from." Calcifer was giving me another look and I interpreted it correctly. "Oh no Calcifer, I wouldn't dream of hurting her. How could I? She's so fragile-looking anyway. No, I'm just going to make it quite impossible for her to escape me. And now, I believe I have a few letters to forge." I waved my hand and paper and a quill and ink pot appeared. The quill began to write what I told it.

"Master Howl, what are the letters for?" my apprentice asked naively, not catching on entirely.

"These," I said deliberately, determined to give a clean excuse to the ten-year-old, "are to make sure our dear girl won't be missed. The king suspects me enough for disappearances anyway," I tacked on under my breath.

Sophie

The day after my little run-in with the great wizard (which I had told no one about) I was back in the hat shop, closing up but still full of energy. I didn't know why—maybe because we'd had so many customers that day. So I grabbed my hat and decided to take a little night walk. The streets were always safe in town. I had nothing to worry about, and besides, this timid little mouse felt like she could throw a thief ten feet right now! I didn't know where my crazy energy was coming from, but I knew I'd never be able to sleep, that was for sure. My shoes hardly made a noise on the cobblestones as I emerged into the town square with the fountain still burbling in the middle. No one else was out now as far as I could tell—it was around ten o'clock, after all. The moon came out form behind a cloud and I could see every detail on the fountain, spouting water and looking peaceful as can be. I was tempted to sit by the edge but was simply too hyper to sit still! How unlike me. So I contented myself with standing out in the open of the square, breathing in the late-spring night breeze and feeling so calm despite my unusual bubbliness.

The moon hid behind another cloud and as it did so, I thought I heard the gentle swooping of wings. Perhaps there was an owl about. I was about to turn to see where the bird was when something grabbed me from behind. On pure instinct I sucked in air to let out a piercing scream but a hand covered my mouth. Another arm took me around the waist and suddenly the cobblestones weren't there anymore and the ground was rushing away from me. My eyes widened so much I thought my head would explode, and I started feeling dizzy from the height and sudden rise in altitude. Again, that was the least of my problems. I was being carried through the air by something that felt human, based on the arms and whatnot, but was flying. _Ah, hell, Sophie_, I thought. _You've gone and gotten yourself captured by a demon. Now demons can eat you instead of a wizard. Who knew it would come to this?_ I struggled anyway, trying to at least pry the offending hand away from my mouth. That was a start, right?

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," a voice murmured in my ear. I froze mid-struggle and just about died on the spot. It was the same gorgeous voice of the wizard from yesterday. You don't just forget a voice like that.

Well, all the more reason to keep squirming. Whatever the wizard wanted, it wasn't going to be good for me, so I figured a drop to the ground would be alright.

"You know, I could just drop you and save you the trouble," he said irritably, although his fingers loosened slightly.

I tossed my head free of his hand so I could speak. "Well then if you dropped me what would be the point of that? You went to all this trouble just so you could watch me plummet to my death?"

He gritted his teeth. She was right and she knew it.

I caught a glimpse of where we were headed and I froze up again. Ahead of us was what was unmistakably the wizard Howl's traveling castle. _You're kidding. Howl?_ The _Howl? Why me. Just…why me. _I resisted the urge to groan out loud. The maybe-Howl looked at me in amusement when my limbs went slack.

"That's right, my little mouse. That's me, the great—"

"Yes, I know, wizard Howl. Now there's a shock. Why didn't I think of you before?" I cut him off, obviously ticking him off as well. I was so unlike myself today. I was never angry at anyone; I just took whatever came and sat back submissively while I watched the rest of the world. But Howl taking me away from my home, what little I had, had caused something in me to break—I had had enough of being the drab and unremarkable one. I was going to do something with my life so maybe I could defy my odds as the eldest of three sisters and be a little less wallflowery.

Howl set me on the doorstep of the moving castle, which was actually for now stationary. I looked around to see how he had flown and gasped at the enormous raven-colored wings that had sprouted from his back. He winced as they retracted and gave me a thoroughly pissed-off look, obviously still seething from my comments. He opened the door and mockingly ushered me up the few stairs into his castle. What could I do but walk inside?

_When I think 'castle' this is definitely not what I picture_, I thought, looking at the layer of dust that covered every surface, from the fireplace to the dishes to the tables heaped with absolute mountains of papers and books. Without my noticing, Howl had come up behind me again so when I pivoted to look the other way I found a white shirt in my way. I looked up at his dazzling face crossly, figuring out that it wasn't too hard to look past the incredible beauty and only see his vanity and cruelty.

"So why bring me here? Why take me from my life, just a plain girl who you happened to run into one day?" I inquired. "Why am I so special?"

His mouth quirked to the side evilly. "Because, my little mouse—you turned me down. You were missing out. And no one turns me down. So I'm thinking you might stay awhile." He took me by the wrist and propelled me to the sofa in front of the hearth, obviously relishing my shocked expression.

"But-but my family-and everyone-they won't…" I didn't know how he planned to get away with anything. But then I remembered that no one had known I'd even gone out.

"Your family, once they wake up, will be under the impression that you left early this morning to visit your Aunt Marge in Kingsbury. Normally I wouldn't bother taking such measures but the king already suspects me for several unexplained disappearances of girls."

I had barely flicked a glance at the door, contemplating escape, when he continued. "And I wouldn't try to leave if I were you. I can get you back faster than you think. Make yourself at home! It looks like you'll be staying awhile." And with that he smiled mockingly again, looking darkly dangerous, and swept up the stairs.

Well wasn't that just great. Now not only was I supposed to be somewhere that I wasn't with someone whom I was sure didn't exist, but I was a prisoner with an egotistical wizard who had a reputation for eating hearts. Lovely. I almost whimpered but contended myself with slumping forward to rest my head on the edge of the hearth instead. I hadn't realized that I was cold until I felt the heat of the fire. It was running low so I took a few logs from the pile and threw them on the embers. A flame sprang up almost immediately. And then it looked at me. _Oh my god the fire has eyes! Ahhhh! Why is it looking at me?! If this is Howl being mean I'm going to—_

"So you're her," it said. I stifled a shriek before exhaling slowly. It was alright, it was probably just enchanted. This was a wizard's house after all, right?

"Lemme guess, never seen a fire demon before. Well you wouldn't be the first," it continued conversationally.

"A…a fire demon? Oh. Well. I suppose you'll eat me instead of Howl doing it then," I sighed. I was having some pretty tough luck with the supernatural so far.

"Eat ya? I'm not gonna eat ya!" it scoffed. "No no, my job is just to act like a freaking slave to Howl! You gotta heat the rooms, the water, move the castle here, there, everywhere…"

I cocked my head. Maybe this little demon wasn't quite so dangerous. "That doesn't sound so great."

"Yeah, well, you know… Hey so are you the one who rejected Howl and made him go insane and, apparently, kidnap you?"

"That sounds like me," I said dryly. "I don't get it though. I'm nothing special, so why would he single me out in the first place, never mind get all wound up when I wouldn't let him buy me a drink or whatever."

"Take it from someone who's known Howl for years, sweetheart. It's all about him. He can't stand being snubbed since he's got everyone falling over themselves for him 99.9% of the time."

This fire demon seemed to really get it. "I'm Sophie, anyway. I would shake your hand, but…" I looked at the little tongue of flame that was resting on a log and looked like an arm.

"Don't bother. I'm _Calcifer_!" a little spume of purple flame flared around him as he spoke. "I just like doing that once in a while, it's fun."

I giggled. Maybe demons weren't all bad, if Calcifer was any proof. I heard footsteps from upstairs and sighed. Unlike some other magical beings…

But it wasn't Howl who hopped down the stairs. It was a yawning ten-year-old boy with messy reddish-brown hair. He was an adorable little kid, but I didn't quite know what to expect in this house. Thank goodness for Calcifer, who unknowingly saved me.

As the little boy gaped at me, he said, "Hey Markl. Howl said to practice that charm from earlier, you staying up to get it down?"

"Uh. Uh, yeah, sort of, then I heard him come back and… Who's this? Does Master Howl have a new girlfriend?" he added in a stage-whisper.

I laughed a little. "My name's Sophie, are you Markl?" I asked, purposefully avoiding the latter question.

"Yeah, that's me. Um." The poor kid still looked confused. I didn't blame him—so was I.

"Why don't you ask Howl in the morning what I'm doing here, I'm sure he can explain himself better than I can," I said sweetly, remembering how ticked off I was at the nerve of that asshole.

"Yeah, I'll wait till then, and I'm gonna go to bed now," Markl nodded. "And, um, you have pretty eyes," he added on shyly.

I just blinked a couple times before I could form some words. Pretty eyes? Me? "Why thank you Markl. Good night."

"Good night, Sophie," he yawned, trudging back upstairs.

Suddenly I noticed how exhausted I was, too. I'd had quite enough for one day. Or a few hours, for that matter. I'd just sleep on the sofa, I guessed. Calcifer watched me with a look I couldn't quite identify, but I was too tired to really notice. "'Night Calcifer," I mumbled and was pretty much immediately asleep.


	3. Temper

Chapter 3: Temper

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Howl's Moving Castle, sadly. Also, the italicized words at the end of some POVs (you'll be able to tell when you see them) are from the song I Will Not Bow by Breaking Benjamin. All copyrights belong to the band/composer/etc..

Sophie

I woke up in a bed I didn't recognize. Sadly, I remembered yesterday's events all too clearly and didn't even get to enjoy that moment of bliss when you're delirious from sleep and don't have anything to worry about yet. So naturally, I had a little freak-out episode and banged my head on the wall before lurching out of bed and flinging aside a curtain that revealed the entry room in the castle. I stumbled groggily toward the hearth and Calcifer to ask what happened to me before walking straight into a chair and landing on the floor with a considerable racket. God, I was such a klutz. Not even abduction changed that. Calcifer was trying not to laugh. "Go ahead," I told him. He obliged. Loudly.

I sighed and decided I might just sit here a second and figure out what I was going to do with myself. I plopped my hands into my lap and froze. Something was off. Something was ever so slightly different…

I gasped to myself. "_He wouldn't!_" I fumed quietly. I was now wearing a green nightgown and my blue dress was folded neatly on a shelf by the bed I had been sleeping in.

"He used magic, don't worry," Calcifer was over his laughing fit and had guessed my thoughts.

I looked at him. "Are you absolutely sure about that?"

"Would I lie to you?"

"Hello. _Demon_."

"Fine then. You don't get any breakfast." He crossed his arms and spewed a blue flame stubbornly. I then realized that Markl was downstairs, too, leafing through some papers on the dirty table covered with dirtier various objects. I was hungry and spied a basket of eggs and bacon so I unfolded from my spot on the floor and went to get it.

"Good morning Markl," I said.

"Hi Sophie," he blinked.

"You hungry?"

"Well, yeah, but we can't use Calcifer, 'cuz Master Howl's not up yet."

"Oh don't worry. I'll be fine."

"Hey! Hey! Didn't I say no breakfast for you? _Blaaaaa!_" Calcifer stuck out his orange tongue at me. I fixed him with a look then had a thought.

"Hey Markl, where's the sink?"

"Over there, beside that cupboard."

Aha. So I unearthed a small bucket from the wreckage on the counter and proceeded to threaten Calcifer with getting an entire bucket of cold water in his face. When he wasn't looking at me, more concerned about the looming bucket, I slammed the frying pan down on top of him, causing him to protest loudly but be unable to do anything about it.

"Ha," I said triumphantly, making sure the eggs were well on their way before crossing back to my little alcove under the stairs where the bed I'd woken up in was. I heard a rattle and turned abruptly to make sure Calcifer hadn't escaped, but it was just Markl. And of course, in the second I wasn't watching where I was going, I tripped over that stupid chair again and ended up on the floor again. Wonderful. Just as I sighed and Calcifer started cackling again, I heard footsteps descending the stairs. And it wasn't Markl.

Howl took one perplexed look at me plopped on the floor, and offered his hand to me. I took it grudgingly.

"Damn chair," I muttered. I marched over the rest of the way to my alcove and grabbed my dress. Howl watched me with amusement. "Where's the bathroom?" I asked halfway civilly.

He merely chuckled, and before I knew what was happening, he had taken me around the waist and swept me up the staircase and down a hallway. My feet never touched the ground. I inhaled sharply. "Do you have to keep doing that?"

"But it's so entertaining seeing you look completely terrified of me," he murmured.

"Not of _you_. Of what you can do. I thought wizards were supposed to be much more terrible, anyway." I retorted, noticing I was backed against a wall.

"Oh, trust me, my dear Sophie." He was slowly moving closer to me. "I can be so much worse." Okay, definitely too close now. He was only inches from my face, I noted with downcast eyes. I took a breath, attempting to steady myself. Centimeters away. He reached his hand up to lift my chin to make me look at him, which I tried to do fearlessly and most likely failed. He contemplated me for a moment, then did that half-smile thing and brushed extremely close to me before leaning away again. "You don't know the half of it," he chuckled as he strode back down the hall.

I stared after him for a minute, then turned and fled into the bathroom. Douchebag. Poor Markl—I wondered if the kid had been corrupted by Howl yet, or if he would be in the near future. Probably would. Too bad. He seemed like a decent kid.

Once I was dressed and fairly presentable, even in my plainness that was made even more obvious by Howl's presence, I went back downstairs with as much dignity as I could muster at the moment. And this time I watched out for any clutter that might be in my way.

After breakfast Howl announced that he was going out and swept out the door onto a sunny, busy street. _Must be Kingsbury_, I thought. Calcifer had explained the portals to me over breakfast.

Speaking of sweeping out. I could hardly breathe for all the dust in here.

Half an hour later I was equipped with a broom, a mop, and a bucket of water and set to attacking the multipurpose living room. I had had to retie my braid several times and pieces of hair were falling around my face as I jumped to get a good whack at some cobwebs on the ceiling. Markl had retreated upstairs and peeked down now to look at a wheezing and overdramatic Calcifer.

"It's like having a witch on a rampage down here," he muttered before running off again.

I held the broom crossways and was contemplating which end of the room it was better to start at when a footstep behind me startled me. It shouldn't have scared me so, but I was starting to space out like I sometimes do, and the tiniest things nearly give me a heart attack when I finally snap out of it. I whirled fast, catching whoever was right behind me in the side with the broom handle.

"Oh my goodness I'm so sorry—! Oh, it's you. Well that's okay then." It was only Howl, who I was already mad at, and he'd heal fast with all those wizardy powers and stuff.

He yelped, then something a little darker crossed his face. "I think you broke my rib you little--"

"Oh save it, you're a wizard for crying out loud," I retorted, ignoring the fleeting feeling of fear I'd gotten at the look that had come into his eyes.

Calcifer snickered. "She certainly has a mind of her own."

"Yeah, I hate that in a woman," Howl said under his breath. "That hurt!" he complained.

"Men are such babies," I muttered.

"What _happened_ in here?" he finally noticed.

I ignored his gaping expression. "It's filthy. Not much of a castle if you ask me, and besides I feel so useless just sitting around."

He blinked, then resorted to growling at no one in particular and stomped upstairs. "Hot water!" he roared back down.

"Temper," Calcifer murmured as I resumed the siege of the back corner.

Howl

_How does that girl manage to continually refuse me? _I pondered. She had seemed like such the timid little mouse when I first found her but she really had got quite the spirit. The only question was, how to break it? I was trying to be nice to her, I really was, for a man without a heart. I smiled coldly, something that came naturally. Girls liked the "nice-guy" act. _He's so sweet_, they would say. Oh, how wrong they were about the cold and heartless Howl. It _was_ an act, that was the beauty of it. My head snapped up. That was it. I was trying to be so nice to this girl who had proven herself different from all the others I'd known. She was different. Her spirit obviously required a…different approach.

_I don't want to change the world;_

_I just want to make it colder._

Sophie

The living room had completely exhausted me. I had given up all hope on my long and impossible hair and it hung free around me in little waves as I slumped in front of Calcifer again. I recognized Howl's footsteps on the stairs and braced myself for the sure verbal onslaught. He actually sounded pretty pissed off by the sound of his steps. It looked like I had an angry Narcissist on my hands now.

He got right in my face. "And what was the meaning of the complete destruction of this room?"

I crossed my arms. "I told you."

"If you're going to live here, you're going to abide by the rules of this castle. Understand?" he snarled.

I stood up. "Well, that's not really my fault." I was getting madder and as a result started talking with my hands as I spoke, a mannerism I'd picked up from my stepmother. "You're the one who dragged me here out of the blue in the middle of the night with no hesitation whatsoever for no good reason that I can see, and it's not exactly my choice--!"

He caught one of my flailing wrists in his hand. "You're right," he said softly, dangerously. "It isn't your choice. You belong to me now and you're going to obey me. Understand?"

I was about to snap at him again except that, in plain terms, he was really scaring me. It was like his blue eyes were emanating electricity, and I was never more aware that he was an extremely powerful, if immature, wizard. And he could sense my fear, I was sure of it. He was already a head taller than me so it wasn't hard for him to lift me off the ground by my wrist.

I squirmed in midair. "Ow—Howl—stop it!"

He inclined his head toward mine and repeated softly, "Understand?"

I was terrified out of my wits by now but was reduced only to huffing quietly at him and glaring daggers.

"Good then," he smirked, suddenly releasing my numb wrist and causing me to crumple to the floor.

Howl

It was good to see that she really was scared of me, no matter how she tried to deny and twist the feeling. Sitting on the floor, her braid undone and long brown hair cascading all around her, she was actually rather pretty. Even if she had absolutely no idea of this. The only thing that ruined the picture was the death glare she was still sending my way. I laughed darkly no doubt sending chills down her spine, and turned to retire upstairs.

"Remember, my dear Sophie—you're mine."

_Now _that_ was the way to do it_, I congratulated myself.

_I have lost the will to change_

_And I am not proud, cold-blooded, fake_

_I will shut the world away_

Sophie

I stared after that jerk. Fine, I'd admit it—he terrified me! His immaturity only made his amazing powers that much more dangerous. Maybe the Horrible Howl really did eat hearts.

Howl

As I watched Sophie sleeping it hit me again how pretty she was and how she refused to accept it. It was even more obvious when she wasn't shrieking like a banshee at me or hitting me with a cleaning implement. Or when she was looking scared. I grinned. This was so much fun. I'd show her who the boss was. And I'd make her fall for me in the same breath.

She stirred slightly, her brow creasing in the midst of a dream. I crouched next to her bed in the alcove and got a little bit of a shock when her eyes flew open suddenly, although it was apparent that she wasn't seeing anything, even when her eyes locked onto mine. Then she screamed and shot into a sitting position, breathing heavily. She blinked rapidly and I could tell she was awake. She closed her eyes again, shaking slightly, not aware of my presence. So I got up in her face just to scare her. She sensed me, and her eyes reopened before she stifled another shriek.

I cocked my head to the side. "Bad dream?" I sneered.

"Yeah. It was about you," she replied scathingly.

"Ooh. Harsh. Although I'd say that any dream about me would actually be pretty good."

She opened her mouth and, having a thought, I magically manipulated the words that came out before she realized it. "Of course it was about you, and of course it was amazing. I'm never leaving here until you say so."

"That's my girl." I influenced her again to get out of bed and walk into the mostly-cleaned living room. I stood close behind her and whispered in her ear, making her flinch. Good. "And I say you're never leaving. You're mine and you may as well accept it now."

_All is lost again,_

_But I'm not giving in._

A/N: Ahhh! Howl's so mean, I know! I just couldn't help myself. Which does everyone like better, nice Howl or evil Howl? Review and let me know!


	4. Actress

Chapter 4: To Play the Part

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Howl's Moving Castle, sadly. Also, the italicized words at the end of some POVs (you'll be able to tell when you see them) are from the songs I Will Not Bow and Evil Angel by Breaking Benjamin. All copyrights belong to the band/composer/etc..

Sophie

Now that was just unfair and cowardly, using his magic to make me say and do things! How was that even possible in the first place, I wondered. How many times did I have to tell this moron that I no more belonged to him than he to me?! Contrary to what he might have to say about it. And all this powerful magic—I could no longer move or speak on my own. It was freaking me out. All my life had been a bunch of messes to handle, and I felt like the one and only thing I could control was my own body. Howl had taken that from me, and I felt my willpower slipping away and tried desperately to snatch it back.

He looped his arms around me and pulled me in to him. "Don't try to resist—it only causes pain."

And he was right, now that he mentioned it. I was rejecting the power he had over me and my body was starting to ache, especially my head and my throat. Well, he could control my words all he wanted, I relented. Most likely I couldn't change that. And almost immediately after the thought had crossed my mind, the ache in my throat subsided some. I decided to experiment and continued my train of thought: _But he can't always manipulate my actions_. And I believed it. As a result my limbs burned stronger with the pain. I let out an involuntary gasp, which Howl obviously enjoyed.

"I said, don't fight it. You're only causing yourself unnecessary torture."

_No_, I thought. _I don't care. I'll never submit to you because I have my own free will!_ And with that my head felt like it burst and I collapsed into darkness.

_I will not bow, I will not break_

_I will not fall, I will not fade_

_I will take your breath away._

Howl

I caught her as she fell, a little taken off guard. She must have had a really strong negative reaction and her brain went into overdrive contradicting itself. I frowned. That never happened. The person being controlled usually became submissive immediately. I laid her on the sofa and turned to see Calcifer giving me a reproving look.

"What."

"You mad her pass out from pain, Howl, that's what!"

"Not just from pain; it was magic conflicting with science. Technically." I defended myself.

"You know I hate it when you control people." Calcifer switched gears.

"It was necessary. And she's different from any of the others before. I needed to change tactics." I stalked upstairs. "Water."

Calcifer grumbled uncomfortably. Sophie slept on through the rest of the day and into the next morning. Her mind had to heal.

Sophie

I was floating in a blue light. It was like the sea and the sky together in one glorious blue-green sapphire color and I was reveling in drifting about carelessly, feeling incredibly relaxed and like I could stay here forever.

Stay forever.

Suddenly it was a nightmare. The gorgeous color was the color of someone's eyes, and as I looked at the bigger picture I realized I was drowning in the depths of the eyes of the wizard Howl. He laughed maliciously and suddenly I was teetering on the edge of the blue light about to fall off, my arms flailing wildly. Howl held out a hand to me and I would have taken it without question to save myself but for the words he spoke.

"Take my hand. Take my hand, Sophie, and stay here forever."

I was losing my balance.

"You don't really have a choice."

"Why are you making me choose?" I sobbed, finally finding my voice.

He only smiled.

"WHY?" I screamed.

"Sophie! Sophie wake up! Wake up, Sophie, you're dreaming!"

I gasped, my eyes opening wide to see Markl tugging at my arm with a worried-looking Calcifer behind him.

"Oh, sorry, I'm so sorry, guys—I just had a bad dream is all." I attempted to regain my composure, managing a shaky smile. However, it looked like Calcifer was being quite perceptive of what I might have been dreaming about and not letting on as to how much he knew or guessed.

Howl

A scream woke me up and I nearly had a heart attack. I tumbled out of bed and staggered out of my room and to the stairs where I saw Markl looking at Sophie anxiously and Sophie insisting she had only had a bad dream. I sighed and turned back up the stairs. Such silliness. And to think I'd almost shown myself straight out of bed! A man's appearance is of such extreme importance.

An hour and a half later I came downstairs, fully ready this time. Especially ready to have some more fun terrorizing Sophie.

"Breakfast. Now," I ordered.

She predictably glared at me. "I'm working on it, keep your pants on, Your Royal Impatientness."

I bowed mockingly. "Forgive me, my dear. Carry on."

I didn't feel like ticking Calcifer off with the mind-and-body-control thing so I resorted to a more traditional method. Appearing directly behind Sophie suddenly, I saw her stiffen slightly. I took my hand and placed it over hers on the frying pan she was cooking with. My other arm I wrapped around her slender waist. She all but shied away from my touch. I felt like laughing like a crazy person at her fear that she refused to admit. Beating the fear down wasn't going to work this time, let alone happen in the first place.

"After a few more days they might start wondering where you are," I murmured in her ear and took delight at the resulting shiver that passed through her. "When you don't come home. Then another girl will have disappeared with the terrible Howl. They'll all cry for you—your sisters…your stepmother…the girls from the shop… Oh yes, I know about these people. I know everything. It's all right here, in your head. But will they miss you quite that much? Who would pay any more attention to the lonely, quiet girl from the hat shop? Of course, I could just make the memory of you disappear. I _could_ do that, you know. They need never have known that you existed at all, and no one will remember you but me, because you'll be staying here with me forever." I felt her suck in air to scream again (at me, no doubt) and promptly clapped a hand over her mouth. "Shh. Mustn't wake Markl, sweet." The kid was asleep again in a nearby chair. I turned her around to see her facial expression and was instantly gratified. She looked enraged but afraid to do anything about it for fear. Fear of me. So I smirked and spun her the right way around again, squeezing her gently around the waist before walking away, out the door, and into Kingsbury.

Sophie

I was definitely admitting it openly now. Howl really did petrify me. What did her want, anyway? Since I'd pissed him off by not throwing myself at him on sight, I would think he'd try to make me fall in love with him, not harass and terrify me to no end. Whatever. He was right, though, about my family wondering about me. I didn't know how anyone else would react to my disappearance, but the thought of being wiped from all human memory scared me out of my wits. And there was no doubt it my mind that Howl could do it if he wanted to. He wasn't that good a bluffer and he had magic enough to choke a horse either way—

Wait a second. Bluffing. Was that the answer I needed? It would be fantastic to act my way out of this. If I went along with what it seemed like he wanted, maybe I could escape, or be let go once he "broke my heart" after I "fell in love with him." Who knew what I'd have to say or do, but—oh, wait. Ew. Bigger ew. I really didn't want to finish the thought. I'd cross that bridge when I came to it, I told myself firmly. However messed-up that bridge's set of ethics might be.

_Now the dark begins to rise_

_Save your breath; it's far from over_

_Now's your chance to run for cover._

A few hours later Howl came back, closing the door a little more loudly than usual.

Despite my issues, I smiled. Time to start acting.

Howl walked over to where I was cleaning out a cabinet and draped an arm around my shoulders, probably intent on needling me some more today. Perfect. "And how was the rest of your day?"

"Alright." I shrugged, not sure what to really do yet. But I was saved by his next question.

"And now that I'm here?"

I smiled secretively at him. "Fantastic." He looked a little taken off guard, probably having expected me to cower in fear or make some vicious comeback. But he seemed to accept this new development because he sat down in the nearest chair, taking me with him.

"Why the sudden change in attitude?" he murmured in my ear.

"Not a change—just acceptance. I'm not fighting anymore," I replied with a tone as convincingly matter-of-fact as I could.

"Glad to hear it, sweetheart." He picked me up off his lap and set me on the floor before going upstairs.

Calcifer sighed and started up the hot water, then looked at me suspiciously. "Nice one."

"I thought so too." I gave him a look that told him that he was right in his suspicions that I was bluffing, in case Howl was listening in. He stifled a snicker and looked like he was going to enjoy observing my acting abilities and seeing Howl get put in his place.

Howl

So she was finally coming around. That was a relief. I'd begun to think the girl had no sense at all. She'd accepted that she couldn't defy me any longer; that I was in charge here. Now only to make her really give me her heart before I broke it.

In the morning I was sitting by Sophie when she woke up. She gave a start then realized it was me and relaxed. "Good morning," I said quietly.

"'Morning," she covered a yawn. "So am I allowed to clean the rest of the house or not?"

"Already thinking about what you have to do? Jeez. I suppose. You've already started, anyway," I paused, then sighed dramatically.

She frowned. "What's wrong?"

"Oh, I'm just thinking that you'll be so bored here once you finish all that. You won't have much to do."

"But I have you here! What else do I need?" she took a hold of my arm, looking completely smitten. Of course! They all looked that way in the end. I guessed she wasn't too different from my other girls, when all was said and done.

"Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure. Would I lie to you?" Her eyes were so big and innocent.

"Of course not." I took her face in my hand and smiled. "I have to go out now but I'll be back later."

"Alright. Goodbye." She stared after me wistfully and I congratulated myself again, ignoring the slight twinge I got deep down when I looked away from her and stepped out the door.

Sophie

I looked at Calcifer and raised my eyebrows. He started laughing uncontrollably. "You… you… you should get an award for that!" he gasped. I just grinned at him.

"For what?" I inquired innocently, widening my eyes. Then I sobered slightly. "I still don't get it, though—I know he's a womanizing peacock but aren't I more trouble than I'm worth?"

"For one, he doesn't want to break his streak. Never gotten rejected: soon to be never gotten rejected and then not had her give in. Well, at least he can think that. And two, you really don't give yourself much credit, do you? You're worth more than you think.

"Oh, stop it, silly." I turned faintly pink at the compliment. A moment later I had a thought. "Wait, can't Howl read minds with one or another of his spells? What if he finds me out before I want him to?"

[A/N: sorry but there's this line thingy that's here won't go away… at least I think there is. I'm an idiot, just ignore it if it's here.]

"Don't worry—you'll be able to tell when he tries it, trust me. It's like someone poking at your brains with a stick. Not a comfortable experience. And when you do, I'm pretty sure that you especially are plenty strong enough that, if you fill your head with only what it is you want him to know, he won't be able to see past it."

"Huh. That's…convenient, I guess. I'm still scared of him doing that, though. And what about you? Or doesn't it work on demons? Fire demons. Whichever."

"Naw, it can't affect us. Not many spells to get into your head or make you do things and stuff like that work on demons."

My face split into a bigger grin. "That's a relief. So I'm going to go attack the upstairs. Wish me luck!"

[A/N: sorry guys…ignore the line below, again. No extra time has passed, so pretend it's not there.]

Markl had been sitting reading a magic book this whole time and had gotten absolutely none of our conversation, but now he panicked and jumped up, standing in my way. "Ahhhh! Wait! You can't come up here!"

I guessed at his motives and smiled mischievously. "Whatever you don't want me to clean, better hide it now!"

He gasped and looked up the stairs behind him. "Save my room for last, okay?"

I giggled. I loved this kid. He was great to have around. I wondered what his life was like here, only having Calcifer to talk to most of the time. Cal was great, just… A fire demon as your only company when you're ten years old? Even I would get bored out of my wits with that one. And dealing with Howl? Forget it!

Speaking of Howl. What was I going to do about him? I shoved down the thought that I hadn't had to act all that much to be pleased to see him this morning. It was only because he was so breathtakingly handsome. And he was vain and horrible and temperamental and cared for no one but himself! So why was I getting little thrills deep down at the thought of him? I pushed my feelings down quickly and went to the methodical task of cleaning. Ugh, the bathroom. _Don't give up now, Sophie_, I told myself firmly, then went to work.

Several hours later I stood in the upstairs hall, leaning on my broom and spacing out in a wonderful state of thinking-of-nothing-at-all-ness. A voice behind me startled me and I probably would have hit the speaker again if it wasn't for what he said.

"Promise you won't hit me this time."

I spun around too fast and tripped over my own feet, and I would have fallen had Howl not caught me. I turned pink. "Sorry," I sighed. "I'm terrible."

"No fair, that's my job being the terrible one." He smiled, taking my breath away.

"Is not." I regained my composure and put on my pretending face again. "You aren't half as bad as you say you are, Howl." I felt the wall at my back and noticed the similarity to my first morning in the castle, three days ago. Howl had put his hands on the wall behind me on either side of my head and now looked at me in a strange, almost possessive way. And with that, he leaned in and stole my first kiss.

At first, part of my mind started freaking out while another part got really mad. Who would have thought I'd have my first kiss with a selfish, if gorgeous, wizard? Then I remembered I was supposed to be pretending to fall in love with him so I let go and let it happen, kissing him back. Now that I paid attention, I realized he was a really good kisser. I could almost enjoy myself. _Lord knows he's had enough practice_, I thought offhandedly. I stiffened at the thought, remembering who this was. Howl pulled back, looking at me questioningly.

"What's the matter? Don't you… like me?" he almost sounded hurt. He was acting just as well as I was, only I wasn't being fooled.

I clung to him. "Of course I do! It's just… there have been so many other girls. Am I not just like another one of them to you?" I was even being truthful. Ha.

"Oh, Sophie." He held me close. "You must have figured out by now why I wanted to keep you here. Because you _are_ different from those other ones. You're unique. Is that not enough?"

"Yes." I smiled up at him. "It is. I just wanted to hear you say it."

Howl

Kissing Sophie had been nothing short of fantastic. She was giving in to me, accepting me, and she knew it. The best part was, she didn't know that that would only hurt her in the end. Well. Maybe not _hurt _her. She seemed too delicate to hurt. So fragile and beautiful… I shook my head hard. I started thinking like that and I was done for. She was close to truly falling for me; all I had to do was help her along. And I knew just how to do it.

"Come on!" I laughed. "Don't be afraid, just walk out the door." I was showing her the portal to my childhood study and I knew she'd find it incredible.

She tentatively stepped into the sunshine, gasping at the flowers all around her by the lake that reflected the cloudless sky. Her eyes lit up, almost involuntarily, it seemed. "It's gorgeous, Howl!" she gazed around, wide-eyed. I reined in my thoughts and refused to finish the sentence that had begun to form in my head. "It's like a dream," she continued.

"And you know what every good dream needs?" I came up behind her and wrapped my arms around her thin waist.

She turned her head to look adoringly at me. "What?"

"This." I bent my head to hers and kissed her again.

Sophie

I would have fallen over from the dizziness that swept over me when Howl kissed me had he not been holding me so tightly. Later I could never decide whether I'd been acting or not when I reached up to put my arms around his neck and twisted one hand in his blond hair. He tilted his head to kiss me more deeply and I thought I would faint until I, like before, almost snapped out of it. Almost. But this time it wasn't so obvious and I decided to go with the kiss anyway. I would have been having an amazing time if it weren't Howl I was kissing. Then again, maybe it wasn't all that bad. He wasn't just a really good kisser—he was an incredible kisser. At the moment, I thought that if he hadn't been acting just as much, if not more than I was, the entire time, I could almost bear staying in his castle forever. I could change him—hadn't I already proved myself different?

_I'm a believer_

_Nothing could be worse_

_All these imaginary friends_

_Hiding betrayal_

_Driving the nail_

_Hoping to find a savior_

When we returned to the castle Howl bent to kiss my hand and I turned pink as he went upstairs. I found myself staring at the spot where he'd disappeared. What was I doing?! He was a heartless, selfish, deceitful, handsome, one-of-a-kind, romantic—_stop it! _I yelled at myself and plopped down in front of Calcifer. "This is a disaster," I sighed. "_I'm_ a disaster."

"Why, just cuz you're pretty damn close to falling for the guy that millions have fallen for before you?" Calcifer summed it up pretty well.

"No!" I snapped. "I most certainly am not!" I paused at the all-knowing look he was giving me. "Well, fine, so what." I grumbled. "It's what he wanted, right? So he can just play his little games and I can leave and be gone forever. The end." I marched briskly upstairs to the guest room that Howl had gotten set for me instead of my little alcove under the stairs, and spread-eagled out on the bed. I sighed.

_Fly over me, evil angel_

_Why can't I breathe, evil angel?_

A/N: Dramaaaa! Do you like the inset song lyrics? Tell me! Breaking Benjamin is my current obsession and as I was listening to some of their music and writing this I thought, hmmm…connections? And please no bashing comments on how BB is a satanist group, I personally don't believe that they are and I think that their songs are just about the struggles in life. Gracias, merci, arigato!


	5. Not So Heartless

Chapter 5: Not So Heartless

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Howl's Moving Castle, sadly. Also, the italicized words at the end of some POVs or thoughts (you'll be able to tell when you see them) are from the song Evil Angel by Breaking Benjamin. All copyrights belong to the band/composer/etc..

Howl

"This is a disaster," I groaned to Calcifer, sinking into the seat in front of the hearth.

The fire demon blinked. "What is? Sophie?"

"You haven't guessed?" I laughed dryly.

"I've had my theories. Howl the Heartless isn't being quite so heartless lately."

I huffed. "So what. I'll follow through with what I wanted to do from the beginning and she'll leave and be perfectly happy never to see me again. It's what she wants."

I stood abruptly, not hearing Calcifer's next quiet comment as I went to my room: "I wouldn't be too sure of that."

Calcifer

A few minutes after Howl had retreated, Sophie came back down. Jeez, these two were practically operating on a schedule. I felt like such a double agent. Actually, more like the one on the inside of both sides who isn't really taking a side and has his own opinion.

She just sat there forlornly, sighing, and I didn't really know what to say. I didn't have a whole lot of experience with emotions, particularly not those of a teenage girl. But I had to tell her the most important thing. Maybe this girl really could change the heartless Howl. They were obviously falling over themselves for each other—the only thing in their way was just that: themselves. Even an emotionally challenged demon could tell that much.

"Say, Sophie…would it really be all that bad to stay, if Howl was for real?"

She looked up and blinked. "What?"

"You know, if he wasn't putting on a show."

For a minute I didn't know if she would answer, but she did. "If this wasn't all just one big act, pretending to love the other, on both our parts…" she stopped. Another few seconds passed. "I think so. Yes," she finished quietly

"You're not faking anything anymore, are you. It's all real—" I said after a moment of silence, but I was cut off.

Howl

My breath froze in my chest as I heard Sophie's first words through the listening spell I'd placed near Calcifer in case she said something important. Pretending to fall in love with me? My first thought was: what an actress! My next was: she betrayed me. All the time, she just wanted to be free and never lay eyes on me again. And I had just wanted to break her heart because she was the only one who had ever rejected me. I had beaten down the feelings in me, unused to feeling real emotion, let alone what I knew deep inside me I felt for Sophie. Her words had shaken me to my core and my feelings had come clawing through to the surface, leaving me gasping for air.

And my frozen heart had even almost started to thaw out for her. She was saying something else, but I barely heard the words.

Without a second thought I tore downstairs, feeling broken in half.

_Hold it together_

_Birds of a feather_

_Nothing but lies and crooked wings._

Calcifer

Howl had come crashing into the living room. I carefully probed the air around me for any underlying spells. Shit! He'd placed a listening spell for when Sophie came downstairs. He looked incredibly distraught—most un-Howllike. Aw, shit again. All he must've heard of that was Sophie admitting it was all pretending by them both. But he now knew that he wasn't pretending. He just thought she was. Shit. We needed some serious clarification here.

Sophie looked as shocked as I was at Howl's obvious and not at all calm, cool, or collected emotions. "Howl—what's wrong?"

"You were _lying_? You were just pretending to love me so you could leave?" Howl's voice was laced with a pain that I was sure I'd never heard before.

She stubbornly tilted her head up. "At first, yes. But look at _you_! Could you blame me for that? All you want is to make me fall in love with you so you can leave me behind with a broken heart like every other girl you've ever laid eyes on! And I knew that! What would you have done?" So she was still denying that she loved him now. Interesting.

"Look, it may have started out that way. But," he swallowed hard, "that's not how it is anymore."

Sophie stared at him for a minute. "What are you talking about, Howl."

"You can't tell me you were able to act through all that, either. I couldn't. It was real, Sophie, in the end."

_You are the faith inside me_

_No, don't leave me to die here_

_Help me survive here alone_

"But you…I…you never…why did I…?"

"Why did you being here make such a difference? I don't know why, but I do know that you're the only girl who's ever been able to make my heart feel something."

Now _that_ was something that I'm pretty sure no one in all of Ingary ever expected to hear come out of the wizard's mouth.

"Oh, Howl…" Sophie looked at him with an identical pain in her eyes. She seemed to make up her mind about something and she flung herself at Howl, throwing her arms around his neck. "How could I have faked that?" After a second she added on quietly, "I love you too, Howl."

He looked stunned at what she said, then his arms came up tentatively to hold her. "Who ever thought the heartless would fall in love?" he murmured. He had some extreme difficulties saying it, but he forced the incredibly unfamiliar words out. "I love you, Sophie."

He took her face in his hand and bent his head to touch his lips to hers. They clung to each other in the middle of the room, practically radiating disbelieving happiness.

I smirked and retreated under a log. I always knew it would come to this. By some miracle, they broke apart a minute or two later. Howl's blue eyes gazed into Sophie's chocolate brown ones adoringly, and she returned the look.

Suddenly her face broke into a grin. "What is it?" Howl asked, confused.

"You know what happens now, right?" she said mischievously.

Whoa, there. Hello.

He gave her a blank stare. I could only guess at what he was thinking.

She realized the implications of her question. "You get to meet my family," she said pointedly. "As the great wizard Howl."

He paled considerably as she giggled, but then he became thoughtful again. "But we'll come back here, right?" he asked her anxiously.

"Of course," she smiled lovingly. "I'll always be here."

"Forever?"

I realized that they had both remembered their previous confrontations over that word.

"Forever," she promised.

"I love you," he whispered, and they shared another kiss.

The Beginning

A/N: I finished! I finished my first fanfic! *freaks out* (I just _have _to finish stories, it drives me crazy if I don't. And I just have to know the ending to everything I read. Just call me crazy, OCD, whatever.) Did you like it? Rate, comment, review, anything please. Constructive criticism is totally welcome.


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